Dreaming about it

I’m still day dreaming about love. So many things about me have matured and changed but I’m still day dreaming about love. Not just any kinda love, real love, true love without conditions. A love that has ups and downs but is worth while, something that I have to work for and then continue to [...]

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Expectations

I nonchalantly lit my Newport as I stepped out into the cold. The back of the building where my fellow coworkers smoked and huddled amongst each other seemed almost empty and quiet as I fumbled through my purse for my nokia phone. It was always hard for me to call him like this, talking to [...]

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Soft, Slow, and Easy

I just want to be his princess, I just want him to kiss me caress me, love me gentle, and slow. I know I can be rough around the edges but when Im with my man I want him to treat me like Im soft and fragile. Not helpless, but fragile…

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With an option to buy

Why sell yourself short if you dont have to? Though there is nothing wrong with moving in with a person before the knot is tied, I often wonder what some peoples motives really are behind this decision. I find that boyz, not men but boyz, think that moving in with a woman is like renting [...]

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Afraid

Willy Wonka:
 There’s no earthly way of knowing / Which direction we are going / There’s no knowing where we’re rowing / Or which way the river’s flowing / Is it raining? / Is it snowing? / Is a hurricane a-blowing? / Not a speck of light is showing / So the danger must be growing [...]

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The Father and his two daughters

The Father and His Two Daughters
  A man had two daughters, the one married to a gardener, and the
other to a tile-maker.  After a time he went to the daughter who
had married the gardener, and inquired how she was and how all
things went with her.  She said, “All things are prospering with
me, and I have only [...]

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The Costumes We Wear

Happy Halloween to all of you who celebrate! I myself have always been a big fan of the Hallmark/pagan holiday. In the beginning when I was a little girl, Halloween meant one thing and one thing only to me “free candy”. I hated wearing costumes and my mother subjected me to many years of princess’s, [...]

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Red (I miss you so much)

 Dont Know why..
Nora Jones
I waited ’til I saw the sun
I don’t know why I didn’t come
I left you by the house of fun
I don’t know why I didn’t come
I don’t know why I didn’t come
When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand
Catching teardrops in my [...]

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Last Night (No sex)

I had a very good time last night. “L” showed up dressed all fly and smellin all good. I ask him all the time what it is that he’s wearing. He just grins, never really giving me a definite answer. I guess he figures if I knew that Id run out and buy it for someone else. [...]

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“L” is comeing through

“L” and I are no longer a couple due to personality and life goal differences. I could get into detail about it but I cant seem to find the mood to recount our break up in a blog. Tonight “L” is coming through to have a few drinks, chop it up, and then bounce. Im NOT [...]

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Rekindle (not just HIS job)

I woke up early this morning to a text message from one of my girlfriends (Nefitareia aka Neffy). I sat up in the bed and rolled my eyes, I was sleeping so good and Neffy is someone I can only take in small doses. Neffy only calls me to gripe about her current live in “David”. [...]

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A quiz result, and apples.

You are The Hierophant
Divine Wisdom. Manifestation. Explanation. Teaching.
All things relating to education, patience, help from superiors.The Hierophant is often considered to be a Guardian Angel.
The Hierophant’s purpose is to bring the spiritual down to Earth. Where the High Priestess between her two pillars deals with realms beyond this Earth, the Hierophant (or High Priest) [...]

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The golden ticket

Today I’ll be purchasing my weekly lotto ticket, this tradition was started by my Ex-Husband and myself many moons ago when things were running smoothly and minds were not yet mature about life and finances. When Brock (my ex) joined the service I was only 17 years old. Id been outside of Lawton two times in [...]

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Nikki

I met her at the Fox’s house shortly after Nita moved out. The whole experience was short lived but I remember thinking to myself that she was very pretty. She had stark bright baby blue eyes (which I later found out were contacts), dark hair, and an olive skin color. I could see why “L” was [...]

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Time of great transformation

The Sun enters your birth sign today to mark the beginning of your astrological month. It’s time for you to review the previous year and think about the upcoming one. You are still moving through a time of great transformation, so the impact of therapy, yoga or other spiritual pursuits is greater now than at [...]

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I cant see it coming down my eyes

I cry…
When I’m sad
When I pray
When the stress is just too unbearable
When I say goodbye to my kids EVERY summer
When the anniversary date of my daughters death arrives (RIP Jaianna my angel)
At weddings
I cry…
When I see another person in a pain Ive also felt in the past
When the nightmares come back to back
When he says [...]

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Cant hardly wait…

Im not blind, sometimes I just close my eyes because a moment of happiness is worth more then a day filled with worry and doubt. I choose to be blind because the pain of confronting a fear is something I cant deal with at the moment. I know that this is a bad habit but [...]

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Someone Like Me

I used to think of myself as a nobody, not a somebody. As long as I can remember I only found my own worth or meaning through what I gave to others and not for who I am. I thought the only way to make a difference or mark in lyfe was to measure me by the impact [...]

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Time machines are steam powered

I want more, I have yet to find a day where I woke up in the morning and experienced a true feeling of satifaction. Since I can remember,  my dreams have always surpassed my realities and even when I acheieve progress and make those dreams come true I continue to have the strong desire to climb a [...]

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Another day Another Dime

As another pay day approches I find myself feeling depressed and distressed. Bills are due and somehow Ive found myself very far behind with finances.  I should have been ahead a long time ago. Im trying to pull myself out of this crazy ass debt, but to no avial . Having things is something Ive rarely experienced [...]

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